Annmarie James-Thomas: Cancer mum writes heartbreaking guide to a happy life for her four sons
She died two months ago aged 44 but her lads will never be short of advice and encouragement from their mum
Wales News
When Annmarie James-Thomas was told her cancer was terminal, she was
determined to continue guiding her four children even after she died.
So she wrote 20 tips on how to lead a happy and successful life.
Her grieving husband, Geraint, found the heartbreaking list on a piece of notepaper after her death.
The handwritten lessons included words of wisdom such as “love yourself and then learn to extend that love to others in every encounter”.
Annmarie was diagnosed with cervical cancer in 2011 and died two months ago, aged 44.
But her four lads – Zack, 22, Harrison, 18, Harvey, 16, and Roddy, 13 – will never be short of advice and encouragement from their mum.
Her tips included this wise message: “Worrying is wasted time, use the same energy to do something about whatever is worrying you.”
The guide has been included in a book which Annmarie began writing about a year after she was diagnosed with cancer.
Her book – called You Need Humour with a Tumour, and published 10 days ago – details the tears and laughter she and her family experienced as she fought the disease that had killed her dad.
The businesswoman, from Merthyr Tydfil, travelled to the US in search of alternative cancer treatments before returning for conventional therapy in Cardiff.
Annmarie, who died in hospital in the city, wrote the book with the help of Geraint, 45.
It includes a tear-jerking passage from Zack, describing how he said goodbye to his mum for the final time.
Zack wrote: “The last things she heard was me talking and the things I said couldn’t have been more simple or more true – that I loved her and ‘thank you’.
“I wanted to thank her for everything – from the qualities she’d given me to the things she taught me, the direction she’d pointed me towards in life and the amazing life she’d given me and my brothers in every way you could imagine.”
1. What you put out comes back all the time – no matter what.
2. You define your own script. Don’t let others write your script for you.
3. Whatever someone did to you in the past has no power over the present. Only if you give it power.
4. When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.
5. Worrying is wasted time. Use the same energy for doing something about whatever worries you.
6. Whatever you believe has more power than what you dream or wish or hope for. You become what you believe.
7. If the only prayer you ever say is ‘Thank you’ then that will be enough.
8. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you give.
9. Failure is a signpost to turn you in another direction.
10. If you make a choice that goes against what everyone else thinks, the world will not fall apart.
11. Trust your instincts. Intuition doesn’t lie.
12. Love yourself and then learn to extend that love to others in every encounter.
13. Let passion drive your profession.
14. Love doesn’t hurt. It feels really good.
15. Every day brings a chance to start over.
16. Doubt means “don’t”. Don’t answer. Don’t rush forward.
17. When you don’t know what to do, get still. The answer will come.
18. Trouble don’t last always.
19. This, too, shall pass.
20. I will act with the intent to be true to myself.
So she wrote 20 tips on how to lead a happy and successful life.
Her grieving husband, Geraint, found the heartbreaking list on a piece of notepaper after her death.
The handwritten lessons included words of wisdom such as “love yourself and then learn to extend that love to others in every encounter”.
Annmarie was diagnosed with cervical cancer in 2011 and died two months ago, aged 44.
But her four lads – Zack, 22, Harrison, 18, Harvey, 16, and Roddy, 13 – will never be short of advice and encouragement from their mum.
Her tips included this wise message: “Worrying is wasted time, use the same energy to do something about whatever is worrying you.”
The guide has been included in a book which Annmarie began writing about a year after she was diagnosed with cancer.
Her book – called You Need Humour with a Tumour, and published 10 days ago – details the tears and laughter she and her family experienced as she fought the disease that had killed her dad.
The businesswoman, from Merthyr Tydfil, travelled to the US in search of alternative cancer treatments before returning for conventional therapy in Cardiff.
Annmarie, who died in hospital in the city, wrote the book with the help of Geraint, 45.
It includes a tear-jerking passage from Zack, describing how he said goodbye to his mum for the final time.
Zack wrote: “The last things she heard was me talking and the things I said couldn’t have been more simple or more true – that I loved her and ‘thank you’.
“I wanted to thank her for everything – from the qualities she’d given me to the things she taught me, the direction she’d pointed me towards in life and the amazing life she’d given me and my brothers in every way you could imagine.”
Annmarie's wisdom
What do we know for sure?1. What you put out comes back all the time – no matter what.
2. You define your own script. Don’t let others write your script for you.
3. Whatever someone did to you in the past has no power over the present. Only if you give it power.
4. When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.
5. Worrying is wasted time. Use the same energy for doing something about whatever worries you.
6. Whatever you believe has more power than what you dream or wish or hope for. You become what you believe.
7. If the only prayer you ever say is ‘Thank you’ then that will be enough.
8. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you give.
9. Failure is a signpost to turn you in another direction.
10. If you make a choice that goes against what everyone else thinks, the world will not fall apart.
11. Trust your instincts. Intuition doesn’t lie.
12. Love yourself and then learn to extend that love to others in every encounter.
13. Let passion drive your profession.
14. Love doesn’t hurt. It feels really good.
15. Every day brings a chance to start over.
16. Doubt means “don’t”. Don’t answer. Don’t rush forward.
17. When you don’t know what to do, get still. The answer will come.
18. Trouble don’t last always.
19. This, too, shall pass.
20. I will act with the intent to be true to myself.
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